It is supposed to get easier
or so everyone keeps telling me
well intentioned as they are
that there are five stages of grief
and you can’t skip any.
But they also assure me
that as time passes
the pain of losing you
the greatest thing
that ever happened to me
and will ever happen to me
for which I was on bended knees
and thankful for every night
and told you so first thing in the morning
every morning and throughout the day
in words and deeds profusely
that the pain goes from mind-stabbing
to throbbing only, to dulling numbness.
They even go so far as to assert
that eventually I will pick up
what’s left of the pieces of my heart
and move on, that is
if I understand them correctly.
But to my mind
it doesn’t compute
not now, not ever.
That’s like Orpheus
legendary poet and bard
whose music captivated
not just all living things
but even the stones in the road
who so enchanted Charon
and the 3 headed dog Cerberus
guardians of Hades’ gates
that he slipped unhindered
into the land of the dead
risking death himself
to rescue his beloved Eurydice
too soon taken from him.
Whose lyre was so plaintive
that both Hades and Persephone
agreed that she could leave
so long as he didn’t look back
as she followed him out
of the labyrinthine darkness.
When mere steps from the exit
thinking he heard her stumble
Orpheus instinctively turned back
to ensure she hadn’t fallen
helpless, as Eurydice
slipped from his arms forever.
Try telling him then or ever
no matter how well-intentioned
to simply resume singing
and playing his music again
as if nothing had happened.
Bio
John DeAngelo was born and raised in Greenwich Village, NYC. And if asked, he’d tell you that he’s always been an artist, both a poet and a visual artist. John is a Vet who served in Vietnam. Whether out of fear of death or boredom (probably both), he first began writing and photographing seriously. After making it home more or less intact, he received his B.A. in English from William Paterson University. He subsequently pursued graduate study in Comparative Literature at Rutgers University, where his focus was poetry and was fortunate to study with the poet Nathaniel Tarn, who took him under his tutelage.
He has been published in various magazines and journals, including Seventh Quarry, Syndic #38, Shabdaguchha, Blue Unicorn, Red Wheelbarrow #14, Essence, Worksheets 67 & 68, has a chapbook entitled Beginnings and Ends, and in August 2020, he published Trump: American Carnage (available from Amazon). His latest opus, My Other Wing (available from Lulu.com), a celebration of love in all its manifestations both physical and spiritual in both poetry and art, was published in May 2022. Conspicuous Denial, a book of poetry, was just completed and is also available from Lulu.com.
To accommodate his other passion, he also took graduate Fine Arts courses, specializing in photography and digital mediums (painting, collage, mixed media) and has exhibited in both Chelsea and SoHo. Some of his visual art can be viewed here.
Contact him via email at jdajeb@comcast.net.
Author's note
John shares: "[I wrote these] mythological inspired pieces not but from joy or as paersonna pieces as I did the first time but from the deepest and most profound grief. You see my Forever Love of thirty-seven magnificent years passed away in July '25 and it while dealing with her much regretted and unexpected passing that these poems emenate. I tried my best not to send the darkest howls of agony but what amounted to a coping mechanism that through the distance of Myth, allowed me to experience and detail my grief in these poems.
Hopefully they will help others who may have or have had such trama in their lives."
